Recently I saw an episode of the Oprah Winfrey show about very overweight teens. It broke my heart to hear their pain, partly because it also brought back painful memories of my own. At 12 years old I was 25 pounds shy of 200. It was hard mostly because I was so unusual back then. Now to see so many children who weigh as much or more than I do as an overweight adult really troubles me. I can really feel what they must be going through.
Fat and Fit
Although I was very heavy I was also very active. I ran, roller skated, jumped rope, played handball, kickball, dodge ball, rode a bike and I lived in a city where I had to walk everywhere. Except for being overweight I had no health problems whatsoever. My mother worked full time but she also cooked regularly. The only fast food I remember were the franks and beans she fed us on Saturdays her official day off from cooking. But she also taught me and my sister how to cook.. She said it was a mothers duty.
Not only did my mother teach us how to cook but also how to shop for groceries since we lived a walking distance from at least 3 supermarket chains. By age 12 I was making dinner for us all. I got to be well acquainted with food, the whole process from beginning to end. I spent summers on my aunt and uncle’s farm and regularly ate fresh vegetables from their garden. The first time I tasted one of my aunt’s tomatoes, OMG ! I thought I’d lose my mind. If there is any such thing as good quality fat, I was It. I ate good food and lots and lots of it.
Teach Kids to Cook
Many parents say they just don’t have the time to cook. True everyone’s busy these days but it’s all about priorities. The primary job of a mother or parent is not to be just the breadwinner, household servant / workhorse, but to be a teacher. By the time your children can be trusted with a small knife, why not make them responsible for preparing at least part of the family meal. A stay at home mom is a blessing these days but they still have a responsibility to teach their children how to do things for themselves.
Do You Junk Food Shop?
Though it’s true cooking is time consuming it’s no longer funny to hear women brag about making only ‘reservations’ for dinner instead of preparing a healthy meal for the people they say they love. And it’s really sad to see at the grocery store a not so young parent spend good money for a cart full of sugary cereals, frozen pizzas, tacos, hot pockets, hot dogs, soda, fruit punch, popcicles, potato chips. colas, Oreos, chocolate chips and maybe a can or two of corn. Jeez! Every day is a birthday party at that house. Children should get to know and appreciate real food.
Teach Nutrition
Talk to your children about Nutrition. Back in the day our mothers made us eat stuff just because it was “good for you.” Do your research, this generation will surely challenge you. Remember, we even talked about the four food groups in school. These days there is so much fast food and fried stuff in the cafeteria it’s crazy. School use to be the first place we learned to try something new and healthy.
Food Makes Memories
Good food makes for good memories. A bowl of chili with cornbread in a warm kitchen in winter, ripe peaches or juicy mangoes on the porch or patio in summer; when your children are adults they should not get all warm and fuzzy remembering :’Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun.’
Prepare meals as a Family
The common denominator for all the kids on Oprah’s Show was that they really wanted more time, recognition and acceptance from their parents. Many complained of feeling lonely and isolated. If your kids like to eat, cultivate them as ‘foodies’, watch the cooking channel together. experiment and try out new recipes together. Now that’s quality time! Get your sons involved too , cooking has suddenly become cool because of the obnoxious superstar TV chefs; but a person should not have to pay a school to learn how to cook some very basic things.
Cut back on some of the outside activities that run you ragged and plan at home family activities ,even if it is just eating what you cooked together in front of the TV. It was annoying as hell , but my mom always used TV time as an opportunity for her social commentary. I wish she could have at least waited for the commercials, but I understand now that it was a way for her to reinforce the values she was trying to teach us on the sly.
Overeating and Depression
The obese kids on the Oprah show were depressed because of their weight but also due to poor relationships and traumatic life events. Be mindful of your own mental health and it’s effect on them. Try not to leave a legacy of depression for your children. Sometimes it’s hard to be perky but let them see that you won’t succumb to the blues without a fight. Life goes on. Use your faith and love of family to get out of the hole. And please don’t let them see you turn to drugs, alcohol or food
Get Moving
find at least one active sport your child can enjoy if not master and encourage them to keep moving. Set a good example and do some moving yourself. Even if its just t taking regular walks together. As I’ve gotten heavier over the years I’m beginning to appreciate just being mobile, there are many who are not. Moving helps to keep the pounds off but it will also give you energy, help you sleep better and do wonders for your looks and spirit.
Live with an Attitude of Gratitude
Even if you are not religious, teach your kids to appreciate food and most important, to not to be wasteful. Our mothers were correct, there really are people starving in the world; and saying a blessing should not be reserved for just the last Thursday of each November. Personally I have been very lax about giving thanks before I eat, but I give thanks in the grocery store. Each time I shop I still look around in awe at the abundance and Thank The Creator first for providing, but also the farmers. I appreciate the fact that I did not have to pray for rain, curse locust or fend off moles foxes and rabbits. I just came to the grocery store and got what I needed. The farmers of America are probably the most valuable but unappreciated workers in our nation.
Enjoy the Blessing of Abundance
Plus Size People of America enjoy our bounty! but do remember that moderation or “the middle way” is always best. There’s irony in the blessing that we live in a time and place where we can actually choose to to overeat or not. Think of all the souls on this planet who are thin because they have so little or absolutely nothing at all to eat,. Lets be grateful, stop being diet obsessed and become nutrition obsessed instead. Lets not strive to get thin, but to get and stay healthy by choosing the very best nature has to offer.